Friday, July 3, 2009

Malachi's birth story (Maria's point of view)

Okay. Friday, June 26, 2009. I had another pre-natal appointment scheduled at noon. The last two weeks I had had about 3 or 4 false labors. VERY annoying.


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So, here is a bit of the timeline for those of you who may not be interested in the detailed birth.

12:30 pm - Membranes stripped

3:30 pm- Woke up from nap and am having menstrual-like cramping. Not bad at all. David got home from work and got ready to go to school.

4:00 pm- David left for school.

4:30 pm- Got Ben ready to drop off to his Mom

4:45 pm - Contractions are starting to get painful. But definitely manageable ... However, it was at this moment that I knew ... I was in labor mode. Called and let David know. He said he was leaving to come home as soon as he told the Professor I was in labor.

5:00 pm - In a matter of 15 minutes, I went from still tolerable contractions to not being able to talk during contractions.

5:20 pm- Got to the house from dropping off Ben.

5:30 - David got home from school.

5:40 - David called the Doula and Midwife.

6:00 - Doula arrives about 10 minutes before Midwife.

6:33 - Malachi was born!

*****

I went to my midwife in the hopes of asking her to strip my membranes. But, wasn't sure if she was the type to make sure I was atleast 40 weeks before doing anything. Lucky for me, I go in, weigh myself (gained a total of 28 lbs ... hadn't gained any from my last appointment) and sit down. One of the first things she asks me is, "how are you feeling?" I answered, "very pregnant." Then she said, "Wanna look into having your membranes stripped?" I think my smile gave my answer away.

So, she checked me and the results weren't very appealing to me. I was only dilated to a 1. Malachi's head was at a -2 station. (For those of you who don't know, he hadn't moved down a whole lot - he had a lot more to go) She said, "if I strip your membranes, I really think you will only have a 10-20% chance of going into labor in the next 24 hours." (after 24 hours, if nothing happens - nothing probably will happen because of your membranes being stripped) She did say however that my cervix was very soft compared to most and she wasn't sure how that would play into it all.

I thought about it ... Braxton was with his dad. We didn't have Ben for the weekend. It actually would be a "perfect" weekend to have him because I wouldn't have to worry about the boys being around. I told her, "let's just go for it."

She then asked if I would like some black and blue kohosh to drink. One regulates contractions while the other intensifies them. Since it didn't sound like a good chance of me having him I said, "YES."

I now know, that was... THE. WRONG. ANSWER.

Basically she explained to me that I may start having contractions but that they could fizzle out if Malachi wasn't ready to be born. She said because of the Kohosh, they will probably start out close together - but simply take a shower and they would spread apart. She said once the contractions were progressing in intensity and they were lasting around a minute ... I was for sure going to have a baby :)

So, as you may see from my timeline. My contractions were close ... BUT, I was stuck on thinking I shouldn't be calling her until they were atleast a minute long. Even though, I wasn't physically able to talk during the contractions, I thought I was just being SUPER, SUPER wimpy. I had no idea what was in store obviously :)

I got home from dropping off Ben and immediately told Ayla I was getting in the shower to try and spread these contractions apart. However, I felt the need to use the bathroom very URGENTLY. (had to take a crap!)

So, I did what any normal person would do and proceeded to try and fix the problem that I was having. I sat on the toilet and this is when my contractions REALLY started to intensify. Everytime I would have a contraction I felt the urge to push and so that is what I would do. Then I would try and compose myself and say, "ok, once this contraction is over, I will go to the bathroom so that I can get off the toilet and into the tub." Then I began to notice a pattern. Another contraction would come, the urge to push would come and I'd say to myself, "dangit, I forgot to do my deed in-between the contractions .... next time." But, everytime the contractions was over, I would find myself resting my head on the wall. I would say that I only had about 15-20 seconds tops between contractions. It was at this point that I started wailing and screaming. I even started to get very shaky.

Then I thought I heard the door slam. This meant ... David was home! THANK GOODNESS. I waited and waited - but I never saw him. In reality it probably had only been 2 or 3 minutes. Maybe he wasn't home! I decided to give him a call. He answered. I said, "Where are you?" He said he could tell by my voice I was in pain. I heard a click and then him running up the stairs. (He had come home and went downstairs to talk to Ayla - he had no idea things were progressing like they were.) He busted through the door and he said he felt the blood drain from his head. He says I was shaking and out-of-control. I looked up at him and said, "I feel like I need to poo."

He looked down and ... um observed the situation :) and said, "um, you are bleeding and ... bulging! I don't think you need to poo, YOU ARE HAVING THE BABY!" However, I just kept insisting that I needed to use the restroom!

He ran downstairs called the doula and the midwife. While he was on the phone with the midwife he said, "she is on the toilet ... she says she has to poop!" I hear my midwife through the phone say, "GET HER OFF OF THAT TOILET!!! SHE IS GOING TO HAVE THE BABY IF YOU DON'T GET HER OFF!!!" I guess being in that position makes thing progress pretty darn quickly ....

So, he helped me over to the tub. We filled it with some water and he started rubbing my back. Slowly the contractions started spreading a little bit more apart.

The ONLY thing going through my head at this time was ... (pardon my french) "OH MY HE_L! I am just starting labor. I still have like 8 or 10 hours of this probably. I'm gonna die!" I had no idea that I was like 20 minutes from having a baby!

So the doula walks through the bathroom door and she just looked like an absolute ANGEL. I thought "Oh good, someone who knows what's going on!" However, the first words I utter out of my mouth are, "I have to go poo...." She smiles and says, "No, dear, you are having a baby!" (That was the first time I believed anyone about no needing to use the restroom. I don't know why...) She looked at David and said, "Is Rebecca on her way ....?" He said yes ... I could tell she was a little panicky, but I didn't know exactly why.

Rebecca, the midwife, then comes through the door. And Assesses the situation.

You see, I had been planning on having a waterbirth... I was pretty sure I couldn't make it to the big blown up tub ... but I was happy I was atleast in the tub.

At this point, Rebecca could already see that he was just about ready to crown, so she had no time to check me. She looks down and say, "She can't birth here ... the water isn't deep enough." There was no way that I could move though! I was in so much pain. So, she lifted up the drain to let the water out. Her response was, "If she can't move, we'll make the water move!"

She asked me if she thought I could move to the bed in-between contractions. I told her I would try. David came over and basically lifted me up, carried all of my weight, to get me over to the bed. I got up on the bed (never hated tall beds before ... now I do) and proceeded to push during my contractions. It only took about two of them and his head was crowning. (My explanation of what the "ring of fire" feels like = someone holding a blow torch down there. :) Rebecca said that I needed to breathe through my next few contractions because the skin wasn't ready to be stretched yet. In fact, I think her words were, "this is the time to be selfish, Maria. Unless you want a 'rock-through-the-windshield' type tear, don't push through the next few contractions." That was probably one of the hardest things -- to not push when your body is telling you, "PUSH!"

There were atleast 3 times during ALL of this that I honestly said to myself, "I wish I could get him here and then know I was going to DIE." I honestly didn't think I could make it through the pain. The worst part was knowing I had to feel all of this pain and then SURVIVE! C'mon, man -- are you kidding me???

However, an AMAZING thing happened. Once little Malachi's head popped out - the pain was relieved a ton - and then as soon as he came out and they placed him on my chest ... the pain is instantaneously gone! It's so crazy! (But of course, it does come back, once reality sets in.)

It was a REALLY fast birth. It just went from 0-120 in a split second, but overall, it was a WONDERFUL experience.

And... Just in case any of you are wondering --- YES, I would totally do it again! And... YES! David and I have already discussed what we want to do when we have another. The answer is: ANOTHER HOMEBIRTH! Overall, it was so much better than being at the hospital.

*****

So, there you have it. I am so sorry that it took so long for me to post this. I really thought I'd be more on top of things - but between my very limited naps and a baby that needs constant care 24/7 (I really have forgotten how much work a newbie is!) I'm actually impressed that I got it done in a week.

I love you all - thanks for all of your kind words, loves, and hugs! You all are wonderful!

*****
Oh yes, and the other GREAT news. I have totally been checking my weight everyday because it just seems to be melting off, literally. So, I gained a total of 28 lbs and it's been one week today since I had Chi, I've lost 24 lbs! Talk about sweet!!! It took me a lot longer to lose it with Braxton --- I'm so thankful!


4 comments:

  1. Congrats Maria - I knew you could do it. I am all for the natural - I am not sure about the home thing with my little kids!! Congrats on the weight loss too - that is a huge success!!! I am so happy for you!

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  2. I loved your story!!! I'm in tears! Childbirth is a miracle and you are amazing!!! It makes it so worth the pain when you see those big ole eyes staring up at you.

    Way to go!!! You'll get the hang of another baby. Wait until he gives you that first smile or won't stop crying for anyone else but you. Its AWESOME!!!!

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  3. He is such a beautiful baby! And he looks so healthy! I loved reading this... it brings back so many memories:) And I agree I love natural births! Of course I haven't tried it any other way but I feel like it is such a spiritual experience and you are so connected to the baby. Maybe next time though I will be brave and do it at my home and not at the hospital. And Congrats on losing the weight! I'm STILL working on that and my baby is 8 months:( oh well, he is worth it all! I am so happy for you and your beautiful family!

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  4. wow that is one awesome story!! I'm glad it went so fast. Thats awesome. I'm glad everything worked out great and you are happy with the outcome!!! Congrats my dear, he is a beauty. And holy cow! I couldn't stop crying about Omah!! That is awesome!!! I bet you'll cherish that forever! I would!!! congrats girl!!

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About Me

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Hello. I am Maria. Wife to David. Mother to Ayla, Braxton, Benjamin and baby-to-be. Daughter of Bruce, Greg and VeLoy - and of course my Heavenly Father :) Blogging has become one of my favorite things to do lately. I hope you enjoy!